The Juanessa Life

My dad came down to help me get a doctor's appointment. It's not that I'm not a grown woman, just that it's hard for me to find motivation to do doctor things. And my progress was too slow I guess. Dad was worried. Which would just make me feel worse if it turns out to be nothing. Sooooo I got this: It's a Medicaid card!! I thought I'd feel more ashamed and stuff, but I'm honestly just relieved that I can get kidney work done if need it and I won't go broke if I get another UTI. I can also get medicine! So I have an appointment on the 17th to get my marks looked at. It would be another week or two to get biopsy results if they decide to do that.  So while dad was here, he met most of Juan's family. That was cool! He stayed a night in a dangerous area of town lol. And the next day he took me on a swamp tour!  This is a cinnamon colored racoon named Blondie They had swamp raccoons, lots of turtles and birds, a ...

The french firefighters vs. cops thing is so funny and epic. I love it! I ran out of my antidepressants so I'm sad and very dizzy all the time. You're probably wondering about Mardi Gras. My first Mardi Gras was terrible. Absolutely nightmarish. Firstly, no antiDs. Second, I had no idea what was going on = agitated. Third, we were basically camping out in the street so (fourth) we could watch a stupid parade. I. Hate. Parades. Juan knows this. I'd mentioned it many times. I always thought Mardi Gras was a big, wild party with jazz music, where you flash people for beads. That was a huge dream of mine growing up (like literally the ONLY thing on my bucket list) was to earn  some beads. Parades? Uhm............. Yeah, I'd love to stand around in the heat and sun so people riding on pimped out wagons can throw sh*t at my face. Besides, two people have been run over and killed already. In this season alone. Over BEADS! At PARADES. They basically grow on trees h...

Still unemployed. Feels like it's been a decade. I've applied to 30+ jobs, been to a few different temp agencies with garbage follow-up... And I'm honestly kind of sick of looking at these same four walls day in and day out. Especially when I live so close to freaking New Orleans.  I'm very miserable, regressing real bad, and literally cry every day. Also getting these crazy melanoma-y moles everywhere. I only started looking cuz this first one used to look like a normal mole. Asymmetric✔ Odd border✔ Multicolored✔ Has changed shape/size✔ Asymmetric✔ Odd Border✔ Multicolored✔  Ugly duckling sign✔ Asymmetric✔ Odd border✔ Multicolored✔  Zoom in on that sucker! There's more, but hard to get pics. Definitely a bunch of new ones.  Anyway, LOOK AT THIS GORGEOUSNESS! Deceased from beauty overload This is my favorite part of living here. Rain, fog, and frogs❤ Also got a pic of the Hardrock Hotel. It collapsed 4 months ago, killing 3 construction...

So Juan is doing pretty well. He seems to enjoy being back home a lot still, and he's been getting to work with his dad. Life has been pretty easy. I am doing horrifically, but what's new?  Also, I may or may not have FINALLY signed (us) up for a PKD Walk! So far it's just us, the coordinator and her husband going and none of us had raised any money at all lol. I also finally got some pictures of the babies/strays at the gas station: This is Julius (like orange julius) and Emmie Tigger joined in too! I feel unspeakably alien and misplaced around people. Anyone. And I have a difficult time building relationships with them. So I'm lonely that way. I miss having a furry friend, but these kitties are an okay substitute. I went to feed Julius the other day, and some other guy had cat food for him! I figure that would be a cool way to meet a guy haha. Anyway, I forgot to share these pics from our journey down here: A rock from Colorado(?), ...

I decided not to include anything about the day he died, because it was very traumatic, and it just started sounding crazy. So just a life celebration here. Bubby got here hours after we arrived I was extremely upset because I was convinced they'd sent us a dog paw print and not-Bubby's ashes. After a phonecall and negative review, I studied animal prints for hours and cat back paws look very similar to dog paws. The distinct features add up. I just wish they'd taken his front paw and spared me the mental breakdown. We were looking forward to bringing him here, because I thought his behavior issues would improve being an outside cat. He had a lot of energy, and would randomly like... viciously bite you. He was hard to love and misunderstood by others because of his issues (he was in the shelter for forever), but I wish people could've known how sweet and funny he was. He loooved cuddles, he loved to play with anything, and he was such a goof. Anytime he...

I just want everyone to know that CrimeCon is $300 this year. But Michael Baden will be there. Worth it?? Anyway, it's 5:23am, and I haven't slept yet. It's been extra difficult to drink water or take care of myself. Juan, on the other hand, seems very happy and almost back to his old self! He has a job now and is just doing adult things. We're gonna let him get in a rhythm before he does GED school. I. Love. New Orleans. Or at least the area right next to it called Chalmette. This place is on another planet from Utah. I'd even say this is Utah's polar opposite sister state. More than Cali. More than New York. Why is that? #1: Alcohol Utah is infamous for being a sober state. Two of the driest cities in the country are in Utah. It was also THE FIRST state to lower the legal limit to .08. They don't call Louisiana "The Big Easy" for nothing! They sell hard liquor in their grocery stores. At gas stations. You can walk around with an open...